Underneath The Stars***

Happy Birthday KK.

2009-09-06T04:38:00.005+08:00

Today is Kk Birthday.We all went to Sui Feng pub to celebrate.Got Me,hao,lydia,kk,adrain,hua and darren.Seeing all of them having laughter on their faces feel so happy for them.We all drink alot.Guess who i met??So surprise to saw Stanwin there.Sometime seeing a person that uu long time never meet is a happy thing too.Although i feeling so hurt inside but i dun wish cos of me,spoil all of their mood.I wan all of them to feel happy.In the end,DRUNK de Drunk.HAha.Most funny thing is Kk vomit on me and hao's BUTTS.haha.Think back i already feel like laughing le.Lydia leii,seeing darren again i think she sure feel very happy that can be fren with darren again.Feel happy for her too.In the end onli can say we all have alot of fun.Here Wish KK Happy Birthday.

Lies.

2009-09-03T21:21:00.001+08:00

Today is a day that i found out that my happy dreams all become a nightmares just in few hours that i cant imagine.Found out alot of things that make my heart broken.Trusting a person so much is a good thing but once uu know your trust is being betray.The feeling is hurtful.Once uu know everything uu believe so much have all become liessss.Hearing things that uu dun wish to heard,seeing things that uu dun wish to see yet uu did heard and see,the feeling is like from heaven drop to hell.Onli can say blame myself for being so stupid for trusting a person i should not trust. Even until the last min i still never give up for trusting a person yet i get in the end is Hurt.Pain.Tears.Stupid Me.

Discover My Skin Problems.Omg.

2009-09-01T19:24:00.003+08:00

Today,when out with Lydia to Marina to do skin check at New Yoke Skin Solution.After doing the skin check,i then realize my skin look so horrible.Omg.My eyes leii,dune say le la,frens who know me shoulder know hopw horrible it is le.Eyes Bags & Dark wrinkle.Sobx.How wish one day all this face problems gone.They of cos ask me to sign a package.I put deposite of $10,now considering cos if i comfirm doing,i need to pay $650 wor for 5 sections.Per section including treatment for eyes,face & neck.Haiiz.Head Pain.After leaving New Yoke Skin,we went to makan but dunno is counted as lunch or dinner.Weather is damn cold today.I shivering while eating.After that,we went window shopping and went back to Simei.Meeting qin and long later for slacking.End of today.

Wat Is Love Mean??

2009-08-29T23:44:00.002+08:00

This few days of my life feel comlicated.Love wat does it mean??Why sometime now a days de people heart can put more than one person le..Is it cos of the world is changing ma??Maybe i can onli say as long as those people happy jiu hao le.Can a person be replaced so fast leii..I dunno.Haiiz. Me leii,now a few days feeling sad and miserable, hope this feeling can be gone away soon.Hope time heal me faster.Computer spoil feel so sian at home.Rotting Rotting!!!NO $$$.And hope my casino interview passed so i will have a job to spent my time and got more $$$.Wish me Good Luck ba.

Losing Someone.

2009-08-20T20:47:00.004+08:00

This few days cos of same matters i feel so sad.No matter how i try to keep the person,yet in the end the person still leave me. Maybe it fated ba. Or onli can say different people have different thinking mind sets,view and choices ba.As long as the person can be happy,i will just have to let go ba.Hope i let go the person will feel better and continue his happy life ba.As me leii,hope time heal everythings ba.Cos i once remember there a person told me before,no matter wat things happen,sad or happy,life still have to go on.So i wish this person that told me this sentence de,hope he can do it too ba.So i will move on but with saddness or happiness i dunno le.But no matter wat i miss this person.Hope one day we can see each other again ba.I think that day everybody will change le ba.But of cos i wish everybody around me can change more even better not worst instead.Hahha.Wish this person can happily continue his life ba.I just wan this person to know,no matter wat,in my heart he always still my fren and once a guy that lent me his shouler and comfort me whenever i sad.Thank you & Take care.Bye.

HeartBroken.

2009-08-16T18:02:00.004+08:00

Sorry blog,i know i long time never blog le cos my com is still down dunno when can i get my com repaired or change into new com.In this period of time,i feel so sad,angry,fan and fustarted.Alot of thinggs happen again.Of cos in my relaitonship again.Complicated.I onli can say i once trust a person so much but just recently i found out something that i cant believe it cos i too trust the person le ba.My heart shattered into pieces again.Tears flowing out off my eyes non stop for a period of times. But just cant believe the person betrayed my trust and backstab me.In my Heart now maybe i dunno whether can i still believe in guys anymore le ma.But of cos i dun wan create more troubles so i decided not to say out to the person just let the person forever dunno the reason at all ba maybe it can be better at least we still can be friends ba.And i decided to let the person go.Just hope we can still be friend and hope the person can reali find someone that this person reali love ba hope this person wont betray the person he love again ba.Haiiz.But no matter wat i still wan to thank this person for being my side when i sad.Thank this person for lending me a shoulder to lean on when i need it.Thank this person in this period of time,give me happy memerious.Thank you & Take care.

Time Pass Fast.

2009-07-25T17:18:00.004+08:00

Today early morning around 7am then reach home from dear dear house.Past 3 days i being staying at his house cos of saving transport.No choice who ask both of us stay such a far distance from each other.Me stay East.He stay North.Like huge distance from HELL & HEAVEN.When dear dear go to work,i will continue sleep until afternoon.Wake up eat some foods, watch TV,play Dota or PSP.Of cos i did some house works,like sweeping the floor and i pack my dear dear room especially his cupboard like a mountain of clothes.Hahaha.But now of cos got me,it look more nicer le but of cos i hope the good image does last.Hope it wont go back to the bad image of the past.And time pass reali fast,me and dear dear already together 1 week le.To me,is just like a flash,everything seem passing me so fast,feel like dear just onli yesterday jio me onli.Maybe that wat some people say "Happy moments pass fast,Sad moments pass slow". That also wat i feel and i agree with it.Today going to stay at home to save $$$ cos i own wei long $50.But returning him very soon after few more days ba.So me have to be independant stay at home to save $$ the most maybe go out slack awhile ba just wont spent any $$ will do and feel abit sad cos today dear dear will be working 24 hrs shift some more is on the sat.Haiiz no choice.I think dear will feel more sad than me ba so me is just nothing.Is ok anyway hope time pass faster and i will be seeing him tomolo in the afternoon le.Hhehex.That all for the past few days and today.

New Love Story Began.

2009-07-18T23:48:00.009+08:00

Since from yesterday until today never sleep at all cos very nervous about today events.I know that Sheng Long going to bring me to see fire works and do some romantic things.Early morning,he come find me,around 2 plus we went to Tampine Mall for some shopping.Meet my mei & wei long at 4 30pm at Simei Mrt. Decided to go to Orchard New shopping Mall yet when we reach, we are being inform that the mall is closed. My mei get abit angry like wat time is it now onli and it was closed yet in the mall still got other customers.In the end when to Marina Square for dinner at the food court some more we found a great spot that we can have our dinner and slack there while waiting for the fire works to start.Our view here is just nice can see.SO LUCKY!!While fire works was shooting up in the sky,Sheng long ask me for stead with flowers.Feel abit touched & romantic.Yupp..i accepted.So that our love story began on this day. 18/07/09. Hope we can last long.That for all for today.

Happy Days With Him.

2009-07-16T23:50:00.011+08:00

These few days living happily with Sheng Long.With him my smiles will always come out .Just onli can say feel happy to know him.Today feel very sad cos of quarreling with my sister about clothings again and some other matters about hao de.Just hope everythings will turn out fine.As the same Sheng Long has been my side for today.Before meeting him tears keep flowng out from my eyes but in the end smiles coming out again when meeting him.So we went City Link shopping and "Diao Xiao Er" to have dinner at Marina.Thank Alot Sheng Long.Anyway I miss my Lao Gong Esther alot,long time never see her le although it just few weeks times but i reali do miss her hope can see her soon.End of today.

Living Happily.

2009-07-11T00:50:00.002+08:00

For the past few weeks sorry that i didnt blog.Cos my com spoil.Cant use internet explorer at all onli can use MSN.Now using my fren latop to blog just abit.For the past few weeks,i live quite happily cos a new guy came into my life.He always be there for me when i sad,lend me his shoulder to lean on and comfort me.Some more mostly i sad is all cos of hao,yet he didnt mind cos he like me.I feel so touching.Spending time with him feel happy almost everytime with him,i will full of laughter and smiles.Feel happy to kwn him.Feel sad is cos when i with hao,to me i feel he never cherish me,once i decide to leave him yet he like wan me back.But i dun wish to go back to the past again anymore.Holding him for 6 mths is enough le.That time i with syl cos of him,i leave him and back to hao,cos that time when i reali leave him,he will like wan me back.Say alot of things that make me soft hearted but in the end when i back with him leii,will become different story le.So now i dun wan to go back to get hurt again le.I wan to have a new life.If me and hao reali fated to be together, we sure be back together le.But hao last few days msg me,say that even we have a chance he also dun wan le.Feel sad but wat to do.He happy can le.I just reali hope hao will let me go and live happily with life maybe with a good new gal ba.Then whether i wan accept Sheng Long ma??I can onli say not now cos i thik is too fast and i still dunno him well.Maybe after knowing him well after months, then see ba.I blog until here ba.When my com recover,i will blog again.Take care and love euu blog.

Desaru.

2009-06-21T22:24:00.020+08:00

Saturday morning leave hao hse, starting our journey to Desaru.Me and hao went there hope that we can relax and have some fun.Yet we didnt.We didnt play anything or go anywhere.Cos of we are just 2 person there are alot of things we cant play cos its go by the hotel packages.Me and thinking wat to do and where to go.Finding more people to join us but nobody wan ba.Until 4 plus, we decide to go "Fruit Farm" althought the hotel packages is need 4 ppl then can go but we decide to go ourselves.5 pm reach Fruit farm yet we are damn unlucky the farm had just closed.Omg.So just went into the fruit mini mart to buy some snacks and drinks.Inside also got sell different kind of fruits.This is the first time i saw such a "Big Jack Fruit".Haha.In the end back hotel to have dinner.At night 11 plus, me and hao went to the beach, we lay down on the sand,seeing thousand of stars shinning in the dark blue sky while we are chatting.The view was damn nice and beautiful.Reali like 1 thousand of Diamond shinning on top of me.These view you will never get to see in Singapore de.Sorry never took down pict of stars in the sky cos it too dark le.I feel damn happy at this moment cos is the first time i see so many stars.Sunday morning,had our breakfast,took a walk at the beach,the beach view in the morning is very beautiful too also hardly can get to see in Singapore ba and then went back to hotel room watch tv and bath.Ard 11 45am, prepare to check up le.After checking out,went to Seafood Restuarant to had our lunch.Took ferry back to Singapore after lunch.Reach home ard 3 plus.Meet me mei they all for mahjong and dinner.Slack awhile,after went to hao hse.End of this 2 days.

Giving Up.

2009-06-19T22:23:00.006+08:00

Today morning ard 7 am reach home from hao hse.Meet frens and sisters out for shopping ard 2 .45 pm to 3pm.We went to bugis to shop.I saw a black dress at Top Shope i love it alot.Decide to save $$ to buy it ba.It cost $36.But i think it worth it.After shopping,we went East point to eat dinner,while waiting for long to join, we went to the new arcade to play.Eat Long John for dinner.Not meeting hao tonight,he going out with his frens.I dun wish to say much.Just feel like giving up le. Feeling tired le.From now onwards,he gain his freedom back,and mine too.I dunno wan to be happy or sad.Just dun wish to care much.I now did hold him but he never perish it,treat it for granted and nothing.Maybe now i know why God seperate us a few time when we have a few chances to patch le,cos God know we both not siuitable for each other ba.Maybe be frens will be much more better ba.Tomolo going Desaru with hao,hope it will be fun.I will miss my frens.Take care.

Words But No Actions.

2009-06-18T21:20:00.000+08:00

Today is my second day coming my period.Stay at home watch show using com.1plus in the afternoon lydia come find me.4 plus went block near my hse to slack with lydia.Cos of coming my period,i feel the painfulness of cramps.Very pain until i feel myself so weak.No strength walking more.Told lydia i need to go home.Rest at home feeling more better in the end.Thought hao will after work will come look for me cos i feel no well but he didnt.Told me need to study for his test tomolo or else sat cant go oversea with me le.I understand.But yet he told me maybe meeting his frens..my heart break.Feeling sad and angry.Why cant he use the time to visit me when i unwell yet of meeting frens.Just cos i got my family to take care for me??Dought his words.Do he reali like me??Words but no action.He is right i not his GF but if you reali like a person,when the person sick or feel unwell sure will go visit awhile wether is he/she feeling ok anot rite??He told me just mens cramp but is not just mens cramp is reali hurtful.Maybe he wont understand cos he not a gal ba wont understand the pain of mens cramp.I ask him put in my shoes that now if he the one who sick,i give him excuses that i need to study yet maybe meeting frens never come visit him,some more still say you still got family at home to take care of you.How will you feel?I dunno how to trust he reali did like me.Confusing cos of got words yet cant see any action.Quarre again.Feel myself like a fool,awhile ask me go,awhile ask me dun go over repeating it a few times.Mood go up and down.Tears finally dripping out le.Heart kena hurts again.In the end,i still the one going over to his hse.I know such a guy dont even worth my tears,dun worth wat i trying so hard to hold him back,dun even worth deserving my love.But i just continue being a stupid fool.Silly me.Soon,this fool will be giving up le.In the past,i agree we both xi sheng for each other cos of relationship,but now i always the onli one xi sheng.If he perish it,still ok but he treat it as nothing to me ba.This fool feeling tired le,reali giving up soon.

Punishment & Uneasy.

2009-06-16T22:57:00.000+08:00

Today reach home around 7 in the early morning from hao hse. Raining heavily,hair kena wet.Idiot when just reach home the rain so fast stop.No choice have to bath.Kena punish by pa for the throwing cig case.Have to help him do some works.Morning after bath do until 5 plus in the evening.Went Long hse to have a dinner with qin and lydia.Hao having duty msg me so less,feeling so sad cos i miss him.8 plus he msg me feel so happy but onli reply me 3 times and then say msg me later again.Waited for his msg until 12 plus i msg hao to ask his permission whether can i go out to have supper with my classmates and lydia ma??He didnt reply.No choice yet i went out.Even i outside with frens but my heart is waiting for his msg every sec min and hours.Yesterday my eyes blink and heart feel very uneasy.Like something bad going to happen.Hope it wont.I dun wish to quarrel with hao cos of going out with classmates for supper this matter.I also think too much that will hao betray me?Will he lie to me that he doing duty??Hope all this things wont happen.4plus i reach home,hao still never reply at all.Feel so sad.Cos I Miss Him.Sleeping time.

Ming House Warming

2009-06-14T23:25:00.000+08:00

Today kena wake up by hao around 12 plus in the afternoon at his hse.We going to Ming hse warming yet he never wake me up early.Ownself bath and prepare hao le then wake me up.So bad.I straight away go prepare and busying cos abit rush in time yet seeing him so relaxing seating on the sofa eating foods.He also never come feed me.Yet adrain also reach hao hse le no choice have to go.On the way,when hao driving his bro car,my stomach keep growling.Feeling so hungry..some more ming hse warming is at Hougang wor.After hse warming, we 3 went to meet hui hui,a fren long time no see le.We went to Ehub to play pool and eat dinner.All went home.Hao studying cannot disturb him cos he having exam tomolo.Hope he pass with flying colours.Hao took some pictures with me.Feel so happy.Watch cd for awhile.Sleeping time.

Got A New Lovely Pet.

2009-06-13T23:20:00.000+08:00

Today,i wake up at 1 plus at hao hse.Hao going his classmates chalet.Sobx..I went to meet esther they all.We went orchard window shopping.Long time i never go out with a group of frens le.Having fun being with frens.Wanted to buy a top at Dorothy Perkin but dun have the colour i wan so i didnt buy.Syl brought me a doll.I love it alot cos it look cute and lovely.Thank to syl.Around 9 plus, syl went to meet his frens go clubbing or pub.The rest of us went home.I went home to change and took some new and clean clothes to hao hse.Meeting hao around 11pm at his house.Watched Cds that hao brought today.Went to bed at 3 plus am in the midnight.My new pet name "Angel".I Love You Angel.Muackz.Nite.

Missing SomeOne Again.

2009-06-11T16:47:00.000+08:00

Today wake up 1 plus in the afternoon.Pei my mum go East Point have lunch.After lunch,we went Fair Price Supermarket to buy some fish and veg to cook for dinner.Reach home around 5 plus,use com while waiting Lydia to come find me.Feeling sad cos i miss hao alot.Like from yesterday morning until now never see him le.Hao going sailing again,i think he leaving around 6 plus,still got one more hour to go,Hao will be leaving Singapore le.The fastest is fri will be back,latest is Sunday.Is depend on their performance,so will be back between fri to sun,but of cos i wish is fri la.Hehe.At night,me and lydia meeting cynth and kor for mahjiong at Ah going hse.That all for today.Hao,Ling Miss You Alot.

Adrain And Jie Ming Celebration.

2009-06-10T16:24:00.007+08:00

Today early morning reached hom from hao house.I can go have a nap if i feel tired but my poor hao hao ,he cant.Have to do duty for 24Hrs.But i cannot sleep cos i have a interview at 10.30am at Kallang Way with Lydia accompany.But its give me a feeling its wont works well ba.Went home to waste time and rot.Around 4 plus, we both went Tampine1 to meet Kor to buy their Birthday Presents.At chalet,can say boring and sian also can say fun ba..But no matter wat,we did make our effort to go down.I feel a bit sad there cos hao cant come and join us yet have to do the stupid duty.Poor hao.How wish he can come along with me!!We cut cakes around 11 plus,after that we all went home and sleep le.Anyway here wish Adrain & JieMing

"HAPPY BIRHTDAY"

Love Is Hate And Its Hurts.

2009-06-08T19:53:00.004+08:00

When your heat ache and break when they are sad.Then it's true love.

You cry for their pain, even when they're strong.Then it's true love.

If you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and relation pulls you close and holds you there.Then it's true love.

If you accept their faults because they are a part of you.Then it's true love.

When you are not afraid giving them your heart, your life, your death.

Then it's ----------------> True Love

Today early morning then reach home.Now i realize loving a person is hard.Yesterday Esther Lao gong come find me cos she quarrel with her bf.Then morning when i reached home,my sister her eyes same as esther yesterday come look for me de same.Both gals eyes swollen like fish ball.Haiizz..Make me feel that now de generation hard to have a last long de Love relationship le.Frens around having BGR problms. I dunno how to help them cos even me myself also cant help myself le.Afternoon quarrel with hao again.Heartbroken.Cos i waiting for his ans siince morning yet he never meet me.He meeting adrain to watch wat "kick Boxing".Hope he enjoy but heard he say is damn boring.Hao say maybe he meeting me later.Feel happy but scare later he lie me again.Hope he wont.All i can say frens, in every relationship,must give in and take de.Jia You ba.

Mahjong Day

2009-06-04T23:22:00.000+08:00

Today, i wake up at 5 plus.Went dinner with Jie Ming at Tampine 1.Meet lydia and frens at my hse downstair.Went East Point to buy some drinks.We took Bus 5 to my pa hse cos we early plan hao le tonight will be playing mahjong.We have quite alot of fun.We play True & Dare.Haha..Aloy kiss Lydia face and Lydia kiss Aloy face.But is i plan de la.During that game,i the most wu hua de cos very less kena me.But when kena lydia i unlucky lox,cos she have to kiss my face and more.Heng!! i the most safe in the game.I now finally learn how to protect myself le.So we did have alot of fun.Laughter everywhere.Around 6 am,we all went home be Pigs le.So Happy hao coming back later le.Nite

Missing SomeOne

2009-06-03T18:56:00.003+08:00

Today is onli wed yet i already miss him quite alot. Thinking will him miss me too.Still got 2 more days to go,he then come back.I feel so lonely although lydia got pei me but i just still feel lonely.No hao and frens to pei me.This few days keep going out with lydia but in my heart i feel so lonely and unhappy just that i nv show it out instead of trying to be more happy than lastime.Even i wan to show it out also very hard le.Cos i hardly cry le.Heart numb until no emotions le ba.I can feel how pain and hurt my heart is but just cant show it out.How wish i can be like lydia,at least when feeling sad still can cry it out,will feel more comfortable and relax ba.Me lei, cant cry onli can feel the pain in my heart dunno how to show it out.Haiiz.Went out with frens and lydia for slacking ard 11 plus in the night,yet we feel so boring cos nothing to do,we decide to go EHub play balling but its already 1.45 am in the mid night le and there sure will be no bus for us to go to out destination so we have no choice just have to walk.We took 1 hr 45 min to reach there.When we reach there already 3 plus le.EHub balling closed at 5 am but 4.30 all customer must end game le.Yet we walk so far just onli play 1 hr of balling.Lame rite??When Downtown East de mac to slack and have a drink.Around 5 plus near 6 in the morning finally have bus le.And we all went home. Hope time pass faster,and hao will be back le.I Miss You.

Walk A Step. Count A Step. Correct Date:31/5/09

2009-06-01T09:38:00.005+08:00

Today wake up at hao hse at 1 plus in the afternoon.We took our lunch while watching TV. Time passed so fast with hao.Reached 6,hao drive car sent me home cos he meeting his secondary skool frens.I went dinner with Xin at EastPoint.Reached home ard 8 plus nearly 9. Do a mask to relax myself while doing com.After that took a bath with cold water.Feel cool and refresh.Cos these few days weather quite hot to me.After bath,play internet games with Xin. 11plus hao coem fetch me back to his hse again.Siian.Hao going another sailing tomolo again.Haiiz.Is ok to me 5 days is nothing.Remember waiting for him for so long le.5days is nothing.Last time i never hold him tight yet i regret,now even i kwn is too late le i still will keeping trying and give my best to hold him back.And it will be the last time le.The onli last time.If it reali didnt work out between us at least i wont regret anymore cos this time i did hold him tight and try my best.But i think is very hard to work it out between us cos we lack of one most important in love that is "Trust".Haiiz.All i can say WALK A STEP AND COUNT STEP ba.Hope everything turn out better.

Happy Day

2009-05-30T21:25:00.010+08:00

Today, wake up at hao hse ard 1 plus in the afternooon. Hao back at yesterday before 12 am.But there a bad news. Haiiz..Hao this coming mon going sailing again.Mon to Fri. Siian no choice.Who ask him is a sign on guy.Hao and me went to Tampine Stadium de Sushi Restuarant for dinner. Yummp!! I can eat my favourite Salom.Hehehex..After lunch we both went for movie. We watched 2 movies.Terminator & Monster Vs Alien continuenous.Went back to hao hse.Watched TV and play some word search game.Sleeping time. End of Happy day.

Home Alone

2009-05-28T23:20:00.000+08:00

Today, is the day hao going on ship to the middle of the sea for a few days. Cos it can say there no reception cos the ship will be out off Singapore so can be counted as Overses.Reach home around 7 from hao hse. I whole day satying at home download show and watch except for dinner la. Meet Lydia and my 3rd sister for dinner at Eastpoint Niwa Shushi. Then after dinner pei lydia to slack awhile ard 11 pm she went home le. Continue watching my show until 4 plus am in the next morning finally i watched finish the show cos it total cos 25 ep, per ep got 4 to 5 parts that why is a quite long story.I never find frens out cos got a few reason so i end up stay at home can say for the whole day. I miss hao. Thinking whether did he have his lunch cos he yesterday total me that he busy until he never had his lunch.Thinking when he sleep, did he cover his blanket ma??will heget cold or sick??Haiiz. Hope he fine.That all for today.Boring.

Living Alone In My Own World.

2009-05-26T16:53:00.001+08:00

Today wake up at 2 pm in the afternoon. Stay at home for the whole afternoon watching tv and thinking about things. About hao neh.. i think there no ending between us. Pointless. Cos even we wan to get back if each other i mostly wont agree cos we will still continue having Quarrels. Reasons: No Trust Between Us. Her and maybe more gals i dunno or not comfirm. Threaten. Controlling. Angry when walk away and nv even turn back. Unreasonable. And More of cos. I just hope hao can make up his mind to wat he wan ba. Dun wish to say much. Frens leii, i agree i reali such a bad fren. Have or dun have me it doesnt matter. Sorry i born to be a Addicted Lover ba. Even if there no hao, got a another new bf , i still will cos of my bf pang sei frens de. You know why qin also like me yet she dun have such a problems ma. Cos she and wei long always hag out with you guys. Yet i cant. Cos the guy i love dun like my frens. Honestly speaking, the most Xin Ku de person is not you all is me. i always stand in the middle. Feeling so down and sad. If i meet hao, my frens not happy, if i meet frens, hao dun mind but i mind. How i wish they guy i like can be like long like that. So we one group can happily go out. But is IMPOSSIBLE de.I being trapped between Love and Frens for a Fucking Long time le. I tired le. Both of this things make me so miserable yet no one care or realize. Both sides onli keep blaming me. I set up my mind. From now on this 2 days get out off my fucking life le. Dun wish to care le. Wish to be alone.Take Care.

Thoughtssss & Liiessss

2009-05-25T22:20:00.000+08:00

Today, i went out with lydia and my sister to bugis for window shopping. Feeling quite relax but yet heart itch cos haven get my allowance that why cant buy clothes i like. I try 3 clothes in Top Shop but yet no $$$ to buy. haiiz. I like the white tube and the sexy blue dress. The pink dress not reali like. The 2 clothes that i like both cost more than $50 wor. After meeting them, i already plan hao to go meet hao for dinner and decide to stay over night at his hse. Yet he told me he onli meet me for dinner. Going out later. Wat he told me last week is all lies. Is i think too much le. Yet i meet hao for dinner. After dinner thought he will leave me but he didnt he say he not going to meet them le. Them i know is who but i dun wish to say. I feel so happy he pei me walk walk awhile he say he going home to study le. He dun allow me go his hse cos he dun wish both of us to addicted and just wan concentrate in his work. I trust him with all my heart. Yet wat i get is lies lies lies. He went home watched tv a while and go out meet.......haiiz..I feel totally sad and heart broken. I try to trust him alot of times. I know he lie me alot of times even i kwn is hard to gain back Trust yet i never give up before. Cos of too love him. I still choose to trust him back again and again yet wat i get is lies.Today is the worst day of this week ba. Afternoon i feel so happy and relaxed yet Night time is the worst day. Just in a night. 4 people hurt me deeply and they never even know or realize i at all. And i feel so sad that i went out..story end here. wat happen in the end i dun wan to say le.

Return In Times

2009-05-25T13:35:00.015+08:00

Dear Blog, sorry for not blogging for few days cos my mum haven pay the internet bill, need to wait until 31st if not wrong.Now using my sister com to blog cos her internet is wireless so can use from other ppl internet. Hehex..This few days mostly spenting with hao. But between both of us still having some quarrels and misunderstanding cos of "TRUST". Haiiz..I feel so sad and hurt inside my broken heart no one realize at all. How wish i can cry out all my pain but after getting hurt and hurt again. I think my heart become hard and numb le. Now i hardly cry le the most also drop a tear on my face not like lastime de " Ai Ku Bao" le. Not anymore le.Last few days de things wat happen i not reali cant remember le. STM. But i still will post some pictures abt last few days de. About me and hao neh.. i dunno wat our relationship counted as. I also dunno wat i wan. I hope can spent most of my times with him, i wish i can be back with him just lastime but i dun wan cos i know even we back sure will seperate again cos of "Her" & "Trust". And more things that i dun wish to say much. I just know is impossible me and hao can go back like lastime so sweet le. Unless we can avoid te 2 things. I have no confidence in Love Relationship anymore le.HeartBroken.Will blog back when internet is back.

TRUST !!

2009-05-19T18:43:00.002+08:00

Sorry dear blog, i this few days cant blog cos my mum forgot to pay the internet bill or maybe can say she lazy to go pay ba. So i cant use com and blog until my mum get the bill paid ba. This few days being with hao. althought i feel happy but also feel sad cos seeing him msg and chat on phone sceretly i will feel sad. When he chat on phone, seeing me return from example toilet, he will tell the person he have things to do. And hang up. haiiz..Some times thinking he wan me to trust him back but wat he doing, how to make gain back my trust to him again. Its hard. Yet he trust me,is very easy de, i never msg or chat secretly not like him and i seldom contact guys,he should know but he leii.. so attractive to gals..i reali dunno how to gain back my trust on him. I try alot of times to trust him back but seeing wat he doing, everything so secrety. Ask him, he will reply "MIMI"". hAIIZ. Anybody can teach me how ma??Blog back when my com can use ba.

Feel Lonely In My Heart..No 1 Realize It..

2009-05-16T09:18:00.005+08:00

Wake up 2 plus in the afternoon.Stay at home still the same download show to watch. 6plus prepare to bath and meet hao 7pm at East Point for dinner again. A dinner with him i will be happy le cos i miss him. After dinner hao left me again seeing his back view more and more blur my heart feel so sad:( Hao didnt realize at all actually everytime when he leave, althought he thought i leave le actually i didnt i will walk back secretly to see him. But always see him walking far and more far away from me. Never even turn back his head to see me.Never wan to walk back to find me before. How wish got one day he will do that for me.Meet esther and mei they all later at Tampine 1 after 15 min. Shop shop around.Meet kor for a while. Around 9 .30pm i went home le. Feel so bored and lonely but this is wat i wan. Just leave me alone.Meet lydia and Edison for slack and supper. Reach home at 1 plus am in the midnight. Go find hao at his hse at 2 plus am. End of the day.

Feeling Tired..Should I Let It Go??

2009-05-14T23:57:00.000+08:00

Wake up early in the morning ard 9 plus..cos hao msg me yet cos of continue msg him i cant fall sleep again le.Some more i just slept in the morning 4 plus onli wor..No choice wake up and use com. Time pass so fast. Reach le 6 plus prepare to bath and meet hao at East Point for dinner.Feeling happy cos i wish i can have dinner with the one i love everyday. While buying drink, the cashier of the drink store is a mum of my pri skool fren. She thought hao is my boyfren, she say me and hao very match, say we have Fu Qi Siang. That time i dunno should i feel happy or sad. Haiiz. After dinner,pei hao shop ard for while,he sent me to blk near my house. We chat down stair the blk for a while 10 min and he left, seeing his back view more and more far away from me i feel so sad. How i wish he could stay,how i wish i can ran towars him and hug him but i know i cant do that.Or else i scare i love him more and in the end kena hurt more deeper.Meet Guan Hua at 10 plus, we both gals have a nice chat until 1 plus she went home le. I feeling tired but cant sleep cos i miss hao and i feel confused and stress abt matters between me and hao.Unstatus. Should i let him go ma?? i wish i can but i reali love him alot that i cant bear.I just can onli say walk one step count one step ba or maybe hope time prove everything ba.

Loving A Person So Pain And Hurtful !!

2009-05-14T09:51:00.008+08:00

Today morning hao finally msg me and tell me alot of things abt wat happen yesterday. I dun wish to say much i onli can say he did something that he break my heart into pieces.Actually i before already trying so hard to trust back him but now i reali dunno still can trst him anymore le ma..I just onli can say loving a person is so pain and hurtful. My heart pain until going numb le, now i even hardly cry le not lastime see touching show will cry but now wont anymore.Esther say cos is due to kena hurt too much my heart become hard-hearted le ba.I know loving him i will kena hurt again and again yet i still dun bear to give up and continue to love him. I think i am a biggest fool in the world ba. Just bear all the pain keep secretly in my broken heart.Wake up at 4 plus. Wear my new teddy bear shirt that hao brought for me. Meet him 7 plus for dinner at Niwa Sushi. 10 plus me and lydia go find wenjie,bryan and kenny they all at kbox.We have alot of fun there.Thank for them being such a good frens.

Being Alone..

2009-05-12T23:39:00.000+08:00

Today ard 6 50 am reach home from hao hse. I download show from internet to watch.I watch from 7 am until 12 plus in the afternoon, feeling tired. Actually wan ask hao for dinner de but i thinking is it too early to ask and i scare i will disturb him cos i kwn he having test but i not sure wat the exact timing so i thinking why dun i go take a nap, when i wake up then i asked him should be just nice ba. Yet i wake up too late le is around 6 plus, hoa say he already meeting his frens for dinner le. I feel sad this is wat i get in the end. Frens representing who??My heart kwn can le just dun wish to say much.So my mum in the end brought dinner for me. Rot at home facing com for the whole day le. Actually meeting esther,joey,qin and long to go Lydia hse to ton and slack yet in the end cos of her pa we cant go. So i never go le. Guai Guai stay at home.But later lydia coming to my hse to pei me. Hehex.. Feeling unwell today cos my i ahve abit of sore throat. I now very nervous and very qi dai about tomolo cos hao meeting me for dinner at East Point Niwa Sushi.I reali hope tomolo nothing wont go wrong. Missing him. But i dun think he got miss me ba.That all for today.

Fondue.. Hehex..Yummp!!!

2009-05-12T07:12:00.002+08:00

Today i wake up ard 12 plus in the afternoon at hao hse, he cook maggie for me to eat. I feel so happy cos quite a long time i never eat hao cook de maggie le. While eating, i feel so warm, sweet and delicious cos is some one that i like cook for me de. Yummp!! Around 4 plus, i leave hao hse cos hao meeting his frens soon. I leave hao hse with a sad face but i think he didnt even notice ba. Yet i meet esther, joey,long,my sis and syl for dinner at TM anyway i at home also nothing to do and nobody cant pei me eat dinner except them so i meet them 5 plus at TM. After dinner and slack for a while, hao msg me, he wan to meet me for movie cos ytd we didnt catch it so i agree. Anyway esther and joey also leaving le. I feel so happy when i meet hao. But in the end i feel heart broken cos hao went swimming with Sara, Von and Yang. 1 Boy and 3 gals. Haiiz. Some more hao he seldom 1 guy go out with gals de sure wan ppl pei but this time different maybe cos he miss her ba. Why he nv put in my shoes now become i 1 gal go meet 3 guys for swimming. Haiiz. Qin and long can say last min come join us for the movie too. Cos we all wan to watch the Friday 13th.Before movie, hao bring me go eat Chocolate Fondue. I feel damn happy and it reali taste delicious. Hope i can go eat again but i wish is with Hao again.Hehex..After movie, i wan to go hao hse yet cos of i smoke 1 stick he dun let. When i get up tu Bus 12 hao msg me say he sorry, cos he pursosly de cos he need to wake up early in the morning ard 6 to work. Yet cos of seeing me sad, he ask me to drop the bus 12 and get up to bus 21 to meet him. When i saw hao in the bus, seeing he msging Sara my heartbroken. Walking along the way to his hse we both never even tok a single word. Haiiz. Esther also sad cos of relationship and me too. Esther Laogong i sorry i cant help and pei euu cos i also say i even dunno how to help myself. Onli can say who ask both of us fall in Love too Deep ba. But me and hao in the end still Ok ba.Hao tomolo got Exam and Nafra, Hope he pass with flying colours. Jia you. Hao. Euu can do it de. Jia You wor.

Temple Day. . .

2009-05-10T23:45:00.000+08:00

Today around 1 plus in the afternoon wake up at hao hse.We watch tv and eat together. Time pass very fast to me when i with him just dunno why.It fast until like i just blink my eyes once onli.Reached 5 plus in the evening at hao hse bath and prepare to meet my pa they all for dinner and going temple later. Siian.. How wish i have more time to pei hao. He alone at home.In the end no choice no matter how much i wish to stay but i just cant cos of my pa. After dinner at Simei Kopitiam, we went to a Indian Temple for blessing. Around 10 plus, i finally reached home. Actually wan go hao hse but he dun let cos he scare both of us use to it.So in the end i went home. Actually wan asked hao out for movie but i think forget it but when i reached home after my bath i told him abt it yet he say Ok. And we meet ard 11 pm in the cab and go to TM. But we never watch cos hao check the internet still have 12 05 am the movie. Friday the 13th yet TM and Century both Cinema already closed le. So we went back home. Staying at hao hse again.Hehex. Nite.

Feeling Unwell!!!

2009-05-10T01:24:00.001+08:00

Today i slept at 7 plus am cos of ah ma and my mum louder header voice disturb me, in the end just sleep until 1 plus pm in the afternoon.I try to sleep again yet i cant.Today can say i squite a unlucky day to me. Firstly being disturb by my mum and ah ma. Secondly, com keep shut down and on again. Thirdly, handphone drop on the floor.Haiiz.. Meet lydia around 5 plus for dinner. After dinner around 7pm,i went to find hao at his hse. And stay over nite.Since i wake up,i kena flu, keep snifting non-stop until my nose turn red and pain.Hope i faster get well soon. Receive Joey call at night, his sound was horrible,esther her voice i not sure.Hope they get well soon too.Everybody drink more plain water wor.Take care.

No $$$.. Feel Sux.

2009-05-08T22:23:00.000+08:00

In The KBox Having Alot Of Fun..

In The Train On The Way To Cini.

Today 7 plus in the morning just reach home from hao hse. Whole morning to afternoon never sleep just using com and i cant go out cos i no $$$. Joey and esther did jio me to bugis but i reject them.Ard 4 plus in the afternoon,feel fucking tired and i went to take a nap. My Kantan Kor finally booking out today. He jio me out,and i reali wan to go out i dun wan him to waste his percious week end just staying at home. I went to sayco my ah ma yet in the end she give me $20. Me, kor, my sis,long, esther and joey,we all decide to go Cini de KBox. We have alot of fun. Yet in the end, Joey and esther sing until their voice change. Hahax. Joey and esther drink more water wor..and hope you both get well soon. Ard 6 am in the morning, we all went home and sleep le. That all for today.

No $$$ To Go Out..Sobx!!

2009-05-07T23:20:00.000+08:00

Today,i wake up at 4 plus in the afternoon. Due to no $$$ to go out,i never go out with frens to shopping or other outings. But of cos most of my frens are schooling or working yet i stay at home until 8 plus then go out. I went over to Hao hse. I Miss him alot in my heart. Go over there to pei him and see him. Hao tomolo got one very important exam.If he fail he have to restart studying the couses again for another 9 months. So i never and dun wan to disturb him. So i find things to do. I teach His niece Kailin Math and Eng homeworks and online msn. Around 12 plus we all went to sleep le. So here, i wish Hao good luck for his exam and give him all my luck and support. Hope he can pass with flying colours. Hao, Jia You Wor.Good Luck!!!

Happy Day Today!!!

2009-05-07T04:52:00.008+08:00

Clubbing Time

Having Dinner At East Point

Slacking Under Block Near My Hse

Today thought of it will be happy day cos guan hua and kk is helping me to celebrate my birthday althought its already late for 2 days le but better then nothing.Meeting ard 8 plus.Meeting esther and lydia to slacking b4 meeting hua and kk. Yet they both cancel althought abit sad but no choice.In the end me,lydia,esther and my mei,we 4 gals went dinner at east point.After that we went slacking dwnstair my hse.Ard 10 30 me,lydia and esther cos 3 of us not in good mood feel shack yet we 3 decided go clubbing cos is ladies Nite and free for us.i feel excited and happy cos it the first time i went clubbing ba.We 3 have fun at the Sant James Power Hse.But of cos we learn how to protect ourselves cos guys there mostly are pervert.Yupp..some gals fren that wan go clubbing must protect yourself wor.So end of today.Funnnnn.

Pain Inside.

2009-05-06T23:52:00.000+08:00

Today wake up at 4 plus,feeling so sad.I know hao reached Singapore le but he told me he dunno wat time he then can book out.I say ok when euu book out let me know.But he didnt he went out with frens.Feeling so pain and sad in my heart.He say until so miss me but to me he not.I at home waited for him the whole day.Ask him wan to meet me anot??He ans: mimi,choose wan to meet him or my frens.But if he give me a comfirm ans that he wan to meet but dunno wat time,at least i dun mind meeting.But the ans is dunno.Thinking if i wait for him, yet he dun wan meet me le,i sure very sad.Yet in the end,i told Lydia to come find me first,if i lastly min went off for hao at least still got Ming to pei her.Yet so unlucky,when Lydia reached,hao msg me to go to his hse,say he going home soon.I sent Lydia up to my hse,while i need to go back to take my short.When i reached hao hse,he haven reached home.Lydia told aden about wat happen.Aden come say me,like i already feel so sad le yet another person come say me.Now feeliing so dwn.Wait for hao for 1 hrs plsu le yet he still nt back.Just nw still msg me,say he abit drunk le.Haiiz.I dunno wan to worry for him or feel sad.Sometimes i reali feel like letting go everything.Frens and hao.But hao,honestly speaking i can let him go de is depend on me.But i feel abit dun bear.Lastime hao told me ,cos i never hold him.Although now is too late le,but i still try my best to hold him,but wat i get..Saddness and Pain.Shld i let him go??

My New Life And New Me..

2009-05-05T22:14:00.001+08:00

This is my New Blog.Hope euu guys like it.From now onwards,Tianling will be a new person le.I wan to change alot of things especially my life. These few days,i thought alot of things. I realize lastime i such a failure in Friendship & Love. Me Ling wan to change my life. A fresh and happy new life.Hope euu guys will support me.Jia You.A new me even change hairstyle le.But I feel a bit weird. A few friends say i look cute and nicer. Become a japanese gal.Haha. Thanking for euu guys de comments. I blog till here le. Remember help me Jia You wor.Nitex Blog.Love Euu Always.